Cool Scorpios
Scorpio (lat. Scorpius) is a fairly large constellation. The constellation Scorpius contains 162 stars visible to the naked eye. Located in the Northern Hemisphere. The name of its main star is Antares, which, by the way, serves as a navigation star, translated from Greek as “rival”. The constellation Scorpio is adjacent to Sagittarius, Libra, Altar and Ophiuchus and culminates in late June - early July, at midnight. It should be noted that in northern latitudes this constellation is poorly visible.
The constellation Scorpio represents wild, unbridled, painful, spontaneous passion.
10 principles of the Scorpio sign:
1.
It's a shame there's no one to sting.
2.
Every event is like a sofa: it must have hidden springs.
3.
There must be a serious reason for smiling.
4.
You can free yourself from everything, but not from your own passions.
5.
I sing a song of love on the battlefield.
6.
Not everyone can bear my gaze.
7.
My passions rarely come to the surface, like a shark that rarely comes to the surface.
8.
The world is lost without knights.
9.
There are still plenty of Othellas on earth!
10.
I look like a cactus, my fabulous flower opens for the chosen few.
Scorpio - the storm of all signs,
He is cooler than any crayfish.
It's more expensive to argue with him,
After all, he fancies himself a nobleman...
Maybe that's true
But don't go near him.
Scorpio is always on the lookout...
Even if on the rise
Life has taken its course,
Will be on alert again.
And how passionately one can love...
He will help a friend in trouble.
He will not administer judgment,
You just need to be friends with him.
Scorpio and humor:
Snarky but creative jokes are Scorpio's strong point. His humor can offend, even anger, but nevertheless you cannot deny his originality. He very subtly notices the shortcomings of others and mostly jokes about this topic. It is quite difficult to make Scorpio laugh, even if you like the joke, he will only smile sarcastically.
Scorpio prefers “dark” humor, which exudes optimism: “There is no situation so bad that it couldn’t get worse.” It's good when people enjoy life. For Scorpios, smiling always means showing your teeth. Scorpios' favorite joke sounds like their last breath, and their favorite humorous characters are an evil mother-in-law, a bad apartment, monsters, ghosts (and Carlson in the bunch). It becomes so fun, it's almost creepy. Only when you want to joke, you need to warn...
Jokes about Scorpio:
A man comes home from work, his alarmed wife runs out to meet him and shouts:
- Honey, this is terrible:
- My mother was bitten by a scorpion.
- As one? I had four of them in the box!
How horoscopes are actually compiled:
- Who are you according to your horoscope?
Let's write it down like that. Next week Scorpios must pay off their debts, otherwise they will be in big trouble...
A girl is walking home from work through the park.
- The thugs attacked, they took away her purse and mobile phone, they beat her and raped her.
She gets up, rummages through her pockets, takes out a calendar, looks at it thoughtfully for a long time and brightens up:
- No, that’s right!.. Moon in Scorpio!
In a restaurant, lovers (both Scorpios) are sitting opposite each other. About her:
- My dear, I would have eaten you whole.
- And I you.
The waiter approaches:
- It's clear. What will you order for dessert?
I realized when that glass was unnecessary, telling him, “Aren’t you a Scorpio horoscope?”
I typed into Google “How to become kinder?” The answers were different, among them this: “If you are a Scorpio, then nothing.”
Scorpio statuses and mottos:
Scorpios always get who they want, when they want, because they want...
“In stubbornness, Scorpio can only be compared with Aries, but still he will never out-argue him, he will only enrage him...” You see, baby) It’s useless to argue with me;)
We are not suitable for each other: I am a Scorpio, you are an idiot.
It's better not to offend me. And don't make me angry. I'm a Scorpio - I bite painfully in every sense!).
Scorpio Personality:
Zodiac sign - Scorpio
Particularly boisterous, energetic and strong.
He is the presidential badge. Ruthless and passionate.
The nature of extremes. He is quick-tempered and dangerous.
Changeable. Controversial and dramatic.
Rebel. Satisfied with himself. Decisive.
And, often, indecent. He is individual.
Anarchist. He despises everyone.
He won't follow the whistle.
His decisions are always irrevocable.
He easily reads in souls, but he himself is always closed with a thick veil.
Active. Curious. Proud.
According to clairvoyants, this sign broke a record.
Doesn't like light flirting. And every single one
They carry the motto: “We have everything, or nothing.”
It is under Pluto, the newest of the planets.
Marie Antoinette, Claude Monet, Walter,
Curie, Turgenev, Picasso.
(Let me remind you that he only wants everything!)
I’ll add: Khlebnikov and Dostoevsky, Lomonosov.
There are no obstacles for them and no difficult questions.
His resistance is a match for him,
He, like a Phoenix, can rise again.
But there are disadvantages to it. There is laziness and impracticality,
Evasiveness and melodrama.
He is prone to mood swings.
He is the Black Genius of pessimism.
There is a sudden sparkle of irritability in him.
He is an avenger, like the Count of Monte Cristo.
He is cunning and dangerous
For every lady, Scorpio!
Just one look of boiling passion -
And you are in his power forever!
I, captivated by your beauty,
I stand as if struck by thunder.
Among Scorpio acquaintances
You are the cutest Scorpio!
By beauty and charm
I will give you the championship in advance.
And in mind from Scorpios
You are the champion of champions!
I wish everyone Scorpios
May their lucky star
Sparkled brightly from the sky,
May you always be happy.
So that you solve all problems,
May the devil himself be no brother to you,
And to be kept in your sting
Always love's sweet poison!
Them, poisonous scorpions,
Many are in distant countries.
They are a godsend for spies:
The client is wetted on the sly.
Our Scorpio is not poisonous,
Smiling, direct, open
And it won’t sting in vain.
But can we imagine -
The drunken goat will stick to him,
Snake, of which we have enough,
Suddenly he will crawl towards Scorpio.
At such hours he will not be afraid,
And if necessary, he will bite -
And the "emergency" will not save,
But my comrade is in trouble,
Then he will stand up for his friend.
But today it is difficult for many,
And the house has more than one floor
People deprived of friends
Since there are few Scorpios
Such as our birthday boy.
We are all within ourselves. Let's go our own way
We are proud that we exist in the world.
Self-confidence, stubbornness, honor
Our dear companions, by God.
We are nowhere from the threshold,
We can’t get involved in other people’s relationships.
From birth we despise the word "flattery"
And only with the truth do we keep pace.
We will never leave the shores,
And what else? We still have humor.
We walk through life purposefully,
There is a huge road ahead.
May happiness await Scorpios
On a very responsible path.
There is no sign more passionate than Scorpio
And no one is more decisive than him:
Scorpio has the makings
And the temperament of a champion.
If this is your personality,
Don't be foolish in the face of fate
And, having taken the bastion redoubts,
Raise the banner of victory!
And in this same connection
Overcome any limits
To be sure to win the queens
Or jump out at once into the “queens”!
Scorpio's path is thorny and difficult,
He cannot live without difficulties,
And if they are not there, then he himself will
He will undertake to build them for himself.
"Responsibility is the magic word"
He taught himself this lesson from childhood.
If he promised, then it’s done
Everything will be at its best right on time.
Be friends with him so you don't get hurt
There is a fiery scorpion STING in you!
How to congratulate Scorpio
Fatal Champion
By frantic passions,
Riots, dramas and battles?
Congratulations, knowing for sure:
You won't find a brighter sign.
Without hiding my feelings today,
We confess our love.
The depth of his soul
It contains the whole world.
How obedient and gentle
Only the marriage partner knows.
He's happy with himself
Because it can definitely
Give an answer to a difficult one
Our question: “What makes happiness lasting?”
There is no doubt for you -
Always be in the fight
And salvation from troubles
Will bring love to you.
With her you will strengthen your spirit,
Briefly you will find peace in it,
Like a phoenix you will be reborn,
To rush into battle again.
We want to be close to you
Both in feast and in battle:
Being with your loved one is like a reward,
Even if life is on the edge.
And today, congratulations,
Scorpio, we say:
There is no need for heaven without you,
And with you, hell is dear to us!
Not at UNESCO, not a spy -
Here, now, slightly jokingly,
Congratulations Scorpio -
Golden man!
You are talented and assertive
Kinds are prodigies, ancestors are nobility,
And in business such speed -
You can't catch up on a rocket.
We only wish for little things
So that there are no regrets!
Hit your enemies with your tail and sting,
But don’t feel sorry for yourself and us!
STARS & FATES (Claire Petulengro)
Scorpio October 24 - November 22
Deep, nervous, persistent and jealous are the key words that describe Scorpio. This is a very contradictory character, strong and weak at the same time, the most mysterious sign of the Zodiac. These people have an amazing ability to pick themselves up, dust themselves off and move on. Like real scorpions, they have a sting, but use it only when there is no alternative left.
Scorpio's appearance perfectly reflects his deep inner world. Although Scorpios are very proud and determined, they are characterized by recklessness and rashness. Sometimes they still listen to common sense, but, unfortunately, not as often as they should. Scorpios are well aware of what they want. Enthusiastic ranting is not their style. They rarely go into confrontation. Strong determination and complete focus allow them to achieve what they want. They have a sharp mind and a strong character, although they are familiar with periods of complete uncertainty and anxiety. But they try their best not to show it. If they are cheerful, then everyone sees it, but Scorpios’ despair is deep and uncontrollable. But how can this amazing sign live differently?
People don't always realize how straightforward Scorpio is. If Scorpio has given his word, he will never go back on it. You can rely on him in any situation. If Scorpio said “yes,” then he meant “yes.” It is very difficult to get Scorpios to change their minds. Sometimes their straightforwardness balances on the verge of sarcasm. When they are angry, they give free rein to their sharp, stinging tongue. But those who love them know very well that this shortcoming can be reconciled. But in difficult times, you can always rely on good old Scorpio.
Friends are very important for Scorpios, but family comes first for him. They always think about the future; petty affairs are not for them. If they don't like a person, they simply won't date him anymore. Their thoughts are always written on their faces. They don't want to be rude. I would call Scorpios honest. That's why you can always rely on them. In the end, it’s always better to know what you can count on than to constantly encounter surprises that are not always pleasant, right?
Scorpios are very jealous. They can live happily ever after with a partner, and then something clicks in their head, and they begin to accuse old friends of all mortal sins. And the most offensive thing is that such a moment cannot be predicted. Scorpio instantly raises a striking sting into the air at the first sign of danger, real or imaginary. As soon as Scorpio felt safe and realized that his partner and his property would remain with him, he immediately calms down and forgets about his jealousy.
Scorpios are generous by nature. They are willing to give their last penny to someone in need if they feel that that person's need is greater than their own. But they are well aware of the value of money. They rarely remain broke, but at the same time they are able to be satisfied with the simplest joys of life. Luxury, of course, is good, but sincerity and true friends are much more important for Scorpios. Scorpios need friends and know how to value their friendship. They always pay love for love. If a person is dear to them, they will spare no effort and money to help him in a difficult situation. Then they are ready for any sacrifice. I have a Scorpio friend who loves to spend Christmas at home with her family. When she found out that her friend had no family and no plans for Christmas, she immediately canceled all her plans to please her friend, although it was a big sacrifice on her part. Instead of a quiet Christmas with her family, she threw a noisy party, invited a lot of people and gave her friend the happiest Christmas in many years.
The main thing for Scorpio is to find a suitable partner, a person who would make his life meaningful and spur his ambition. Love is vital for close relationships; without it there is nothing to talk about. Scorpios are wise and quick-witted, emotional and magnetically attractive. But I bet your head is cut off, they themselves cannot understand their own feelings.
Julia Roberts is a typical Scorpio. She tried many times to start a family with her loved one, but each time she was unsuccessful. The only time she managed to say the cherished “yes” was her marriage to Scorpio Lyle Lovett. They rushed into this marriage headlong, as Scorpios often do, and when it was all over, they remained close friends, ready to come to each other’s aid.
If Scorpios want something, they want it so passionately that they can literally taste their desire. It turns into an obsessive thought, and no amount of advice or lectures will make them change their mind. They can sit and listen to your instructions for hours. You'll think you've succeeded, but they go out and do things their own way. If they decide to have fun, then they can be mistaken for crazy people, but when they decide to go to bed early, you will think that you are in a nursing home - cocoa at night, warm slippers and a calm program on TV.
No friend can compare to a Scorpio friend. Everyone else will support you in difficult times and are ready to make sacrifices for you, but in any case, they will think about themselves first. Scorpio never thinks. Caution is alien to him, he will move heaven and earth just to help you.
When Scorpios find an interesting job, they are ready to work day and night. You will not find a more efficient person in any sign of the Zodiac. But if they don't like something, you'll never convince them to try it again. If your Scorpio child doesn't like bananas, suck it up and just don't buy them anymore. If a Scorpio husband does not like to do housework, it is useless to buy hammers and nails and place them everywhere, in the hope that his conscience will awaken in him.
Scorpios are not susceptible to melancholy; they hate being sick. They simply don't have time for this. They have so many ambitious plans that require implementation, but they will not tell you about them out loud. They prefer to be guided by the hand of fate, and they believe that they are doing good, even if unconsciously. Actresses Meg Ryan, Demi Moore and Jodie Foster were born under this sign - and they all knew that they would be famous even in early childhood, although they did not talk about it. These actresses received their Oscars. Have no doubt, any Scorpio is capable of entertaining his friends with no less talent - but they don’t give Oscars for this.
When Scorpio is in a bad mood, it is immediately noticeable. Scorpio is ruled by two planets at once - Mars and Pluto. This sign does not recognize halftones. If Scorpio becomes an alcoholic or drug addict, this is forever, and in order for him to get out of this state, he will need good professional help. But don’t think that any Scorpio who drinks a glass necessarily becomes an alcoholic. It’s just that an angel and a devil are sitting on this man’s shoulders, and each is pushing him in his own direction. If Scorpio decides to lead a healthy lifestyle, then here too he will not accept half measures. Less decisive friends begin to be ashamed of their tummies, standing next to the slender and fit Scorpio. Scorpios are very insightful; rarely anything can be hidden from their gaze. They recognize lies immediately and do not know how to lie themselves. But their love is pure and sincere.
Love Scorpios, and they will repay you with love. Scorpios are wonderful friends, spouses, mothers-in-law and mothers-in-law. Just don't be dishonest with them - they can't stand it. And don’t forget to take an interest in their affairs from time to time. You can't even imagine how important this is for them. Offer them your support, and together you can work wonders.
SECRETS OF THE SEXES
What is the difference between men and women born under this sign? Let's get a look.
Scorpio Women
If a Scorpio woman stings you, it will hurt. But she will only do this if you betray her. Treat her well, and she will become your best friend and reliable partner. She will make any sacrifice to make you feel good. You will always come first for her if she truly loves you. Once you have made a commitment, she will protect your interests with nail and tooth. No matter how serious your financial problems are, she will support you and help you until you make your million and climb the social ladder. She doesn't think about what people will say about her. She is much more busy with what is happening in her own life. If she has problems with you, she will tell you about them, not Aunt Mavis or Uncle Frank. Only you, you alone. She doesn't care about the opinions of strangers. She only cares about what happens in your relationship, and this concerns only the two of you.
The Scorpio woman is very attractive. She has an amazing magnetism that attracts a lot of fans to her. It is not easy for her to choose a partner for marriage, but she has an innate lie detector. If you are going to lie to her, it is better not to look into her eyes, otherwise she will read you like an open book. And if you avoid meeting her gaze, you will unwittingly give yourself away. And given the unpredictability of the Scorpio woman’s behavior, I would not want to be in your place.
Such a woman always has many friends who are dear to her for a variety of reasons. She treats all of them well, but they can have rather contradictory feelings towards each other. Therefore, you should not invite them all to some party.
If a Scorpio woman decides that you have some problems with her, she will directly ask you what is the matter. If you don't tell right away, she will still get to the bottom of the truth, carefully examining everything from your checkbook to your clothes.
If she works hard and enjoys her work, the Scorpio woman is quite happy. Her house is always in perfect order, and her bedroom is absolutely amazing. I have never met a Scorpio woman who didn’t have a TV in her bedroom. (“Darling, you should definitely watch your favorite TV series from bed one day! It’s amazing!”) If she doesn’t like her job, if she hasn’t found her place in life, then the Scorpio woman turns into a walking misfortune. She is capable of turning the life of any person into hell, and then dragging him down to the bottom after her. It’s better to immediately ask Mrs. Scorpio what she wants from life. If she doesn’t know, then run from her like fire, because in this state she is dangerous to others and to herself. But don’t forget to tell her before you leave that you believe in her strength and that she can achieve anything she wants. This is what the stars want. Scorpio women have great faith in fate, and your words can push her to take the decisive step she so needs.
Men are not her weakness. If she doesn't like you, she won't give you the slightest chance. This is not the kind-hearted Mrs. Cancer, who is ready to sleep with men whom she feels sorry for. No, Mrs. Scorpio will only go to bed with a very special person. If she gave herself to a man, she did it with all her heart, soul and body.
Do not even think about deceiving such a woman, otherwise you will face sophisticated revenge. You won't get a job, your car won't start, every half hour you'll get pizza from a nearby pizzeria. (And don't ask me how she can put you out of a job. This woman can do anything!) She loves when other people learn life lessons that are just as hard as the ones she learned. As a rule, she does not marry the wrong man. She has a great sense of danger. Although the taste of danger in the bedroom excites her! The Scorpio woman is a great value, but I would not advise you to take her lightly.
Scorpio men
The Scorpio man is very proud, he loves for everyone to know about his achievements. Before planning his life, he experiences severe pain. He suffers if something does not go as he planned. Scorpio always strives for perfection and has a great need for security. If he marries, it’s for life. If he lives with a woman for several years and does not propose marriage to her, then you need to have a serious conversation with him. Apparently, he does not take this relationship seriously. When he realizes the seriousness of his intentions, he cannot be dissuaded from marriage. He will definitely want to formalize his relationship with the one he loves. Among homosexuals in America, mostly Scorpios seek to formalize their relationships.
Scorpios give themselves to everything they do with passion. They are real owners and very jealous. Scorpio men are great lovers. But only the woman who loves them very much can call them ideal husbands. Such a man will yell at his wife for not ironing his socks, but throwing a wet towel on the bed is in the order of things for him. Sure, he'll make you a cheese sandwich for breakfast, but the dirt he leaves behind will require a professional vacuum cleaner. He must ensure that smoking and drinking do not get out of control. Mr. Scorpio has no doubts: he devotes himself wholeheartedly to everything he does. Including bad habits. His slogan: the more the merrier.
He takes his work very seriously, no matter what it is. Whether he is a multi-millionaire businessman or a garbage man, he will always do his job with full responsibility. He can be late for work only because of his favorite hobby, to which he devotes himself with no less passion. The fact that he dropped into a sports store on the way to buy a spare part for his favorite bicycle is, for Scorpio, a completely valid reason for being late both for work and home. No matter how much he loves you, he will still sometimes forget about your existence. It’s so nice in his world, because he knows the answers to all the questions!
You must allow him to lead your alliance. He doesn't like women who are stronger than him. Therefore, try to make him believe that he is the head of the house, although in fact you will be in charge of everything. Make him happy and this man will move mountains for you. Remember that he will never marry in order to go out on the side. Marriage is sacred to him, and you can completely rely on it. His confidence inspires trust, but you must understand that deep down he has doubts. Even if he doesn't show it, he still needs your support.
Try to say nice things to him more often. If he asks you a question, answer it very specifically. If you don't want to be his friend, confidant or lover, tell him so so he can find a suitable partner. He will gladly accept your friends, but if they begin to underestimate him or his work, then it is better for you to get rid of them immediately. His comments will heat up the atmosphere in your home so much that you yourself will not be happy. Be prepared for that. he expects complete devotion from you. In this sense, Scorpio is very old-fashioned.
Scorpio does not feel the need to keep secrets. If he decides to court you, you will immediately guess about it. He won't wait a whole year before inviting you somewhere. Scorpio always prefers sexual partners who are simply pretty. This man is every woman's dream. Protector, lover, reliable friend, he is ready to go to the ends of the earth just to help you succeed. With his support and love, you will achieve what you never dared to dream of. Life with Him is a great movie that just begs to be made.
SEXUAL NEEDS
For Scorpio, there are no prohibitions in sex. For him, the most important thing is to realize himself sexually and mentally. Marriage or relationships without sex do not exist for him. Scorpio is very persistent. And if he or she does not feel welcome twenty-four hours a day, they feel somehow uneasy. On the other hand, an overly confident Scorpio can literally kill his unhappy partner with incredible demands and unbridled imagination.
Scorpios have one remarkable trait (of course, they have a lot of good traits, but this one is very rare): they know how to keep secrets and do not notify the whole world about what they have achieved. A lady in public and a whore in bed - this is a typical Scorpio, and this is true not only in relation to women. Your Scorpio friend may ask you about your sex life, but don't expect any revelations in return. And if you hear it, don’t rush to believe it. Sometimes Scorpios are overcome by real delusions of grandeur, and since they are not going to tell you the truth, you can be branded a liar. The tactics are somewhat unusual, but quite effective.
Scorpio perceives every new relationship as an adventure. He is even capable of radically changing his lifestyle if his new partner wants it. For Scorpio, a beautiful face and a harmonious body are very important, but physical attractiveness is just a starting point. Sex without true love is unthinkable for Scorpio. If a relationship is built on a purely physical basis, it will not last long.
Massage, dim candlelight, champagne - these are the necessary accessories for great sex with Scorpio. Don’t forget about Valentine’s Day, the anniversary of your first kiss - this is the only way to impress this incorrigible romantic who will never agree to be satisfied with little. He needs everything. And this means that in bed you will have time to talk about life, love and work. For Scorpio, such conversations are true love. But he must be careful not to take the relationship to too mundane ground, which is destructive for his own love. A passionate date on a secluded beach is all well and good, but when night falls, it's better to move under the roof. Scorpios need to learn to stop.
HIGHEST DESIRE AND NEED
FIRED, PASSIONATE SEX, SACRED BY LOVE
Marriage partners
Here you will find only a general overview. To understand this issue thoroughly, take a look at the chapter “Under the Sheets.”
BEST CHOICE
CALF- the complete opposite of Scorpio. It perfectly complements this unusual nature. Their appetite for sex is literally insatiable.
CANCER perfectly suits its fellow Water element. These passionate natures suit each other perfectly.
FISH enter into intense, unusual relationships with Scorpios that last for many years. Over time, partners become more and more attached to each other.
LION I like an attractive Scorpio. He is pleased to have such a spectacular partner. Leo and Scorpio will love each other passionately, long and deeply.
VIRGO and Scorpio - a strange union, and a surprisingly strong one. Virgo, like Taurus, has those qualities that Scorpio lacks. She can wonderfully organize the life of Scorpio. And after the first date the whole world will know about their love!
THERE IS SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT
ARIESsubmits to the same planet as Scorpio - Mars. Aries and Scorpios can become great friends and then lovers, but it is unlikely that the love relationship will last long enough.
SCALES are also well suited for Scorpios, but over time their attitude towards their partner may change to a paternal one, especially if Libra is older than Scorpio, which often happens.
SCORPION enters into an interesting relationship with Scorpio - deep, intense, and sometimes even dangerous. If they decide to get married, then this decision should be made after carefully weighing all the pros and cons. But on the other hand, you shouldn’t delay the decision, otherwise you’ll have to rack your brain later - where did this wonderful, sexy and attractive partner go?
SAGITTARIUS can enter into a wonderful alliance with Scorpio, but in order for it to be long-lasting, certain sacrifices will be required on both sides.
PROBLEMS CAN'T BE AVOIDED
TWINS are unable to earn Scorpio's trust. Scorpios consider Geminis to be liars.
CAPRICORN can truly intimidate Scorpio. Scorpio's self-confidence in such an alliance will be significantly shaken. Be prepared to submit.
AQUARIUS too talkative for poor old Scorpio, who is unable to follow his train of thought.
What Scorpios can't stand
1. Boring laundry.
2. Bad breath.
3. Lack of ambition.
4. Lies.
5. Infidelity.
6. Ex-girlfriends or boyfriends of your partner.
7. People who bite their nails.
8. Insufficient funds.
9. Predictability.
10. Cheap shoes.
HOW TO SEDUCE A SCORPIO
The first and most basic lesson: try to be yourself in love. Scorpio will not mind a certain amount of originality, but he cannot stand those who try to pretend to be someone unknown.
Take Scorpio with you to places where you can meet interesting people that you can later talk about, and then find a secluded corner where no one will see you. Scorpios like to watch from a hiding place, where no one can watch them. Try to find a mysterious and unusual place for a date. Don't rely on money. Scorpio can be quite happy in a cheap bar or in a luxurious restaurant. The main thing is that the place you choose has an atmosphere (if you know what I'm talking about).
Scorpio will want to know everything about you. If you have any secrets, don’t even hint at them to Scorpio, otherwise he will definitely pull the truth out of you (or from your friends and neighbors). Scorpio will not stop until he knows everything. I am not kidding!
Water signs love water very much. So, in seducing Scorpio, you can rely on the water element. Invite your Scorpio to take a walk along the banks of a river or lake, and his passion will flare up with renewed vigor. Water calms Scorpios and allows them to relax. Save talking about family until the next date.Scorpio will not immediately tell you all his ins and outs.
You may not immediately understand whether your Scorpio friend is serious about you or just playing. Scorpios often act as if their friend is the only person in the world. They will want to know everything about you, right down to the name of your first teacher. (Scorpios make wonderful detectives.) And don’t dream about returning home early. A short date for Scorpio only means that his partner is not ready to give himself to him completely and completely, which can lead to a complete break in the relationship. Remember that Scorpio is always the boss (at least he thinks so).
Don't let Scorpio drink a lot unless you want to deal with an insensitive log. Like other water signs, Cancers and Pisces, Scorpios do not tolerate alcohol very well. And if your friend snored at the table, then what can you do?
The success of a first date largely depends on how you look at your partner and how you treat him. If you are a millionaire and invite Scorpio to dine on your yacht, then you will only waste expensive champagne if you do not look soulfully into Scorpio’s eyes while clinking a crystal glass with him. The most important thing is the contact that you manage to establish with Scorpio. Money will come into play much more evilly. Scorpios rarely fall in love with those who are unable to earn a living. They prefer winners. Take them to the races, Scorpios have a real eye for leadership. Just don't let them get carried away, otherwise your trip to Monte Carlo will turn into a complete financial disaster.
And try to earn the honor of being invited to Scorpio’s house. I'm sure you'll see a real palace of pleasure there - and I'm not just talking about the decoration of the apartment!
Meaningful details
A Scorpio in love is a very interesting sign. The confident, happy expression on his face clearly indicates that he has found his love, and a satisfied smile is a sign of physical satisfaction. Scorpio is a passionate and unbending nature, for whom success in love means much more than for those born under another zodiac sign. Even a minor critical remark or inattention on the part of a partner hurts Scorpio and can lead to problems in sexual relationships. Scorpios constantly need encouragement and support. They cannot make love if they feel that their partner's feelings have weakened. Scorpios in love cannot even imagine infidelity. They are too emotional to betray their partner, because by doing so they will betray themselves. But nevertheless, Scorpios may well use sex to manipulate their partner - after all, it is not easy to find better lovers than them.
Scorpio's mood is contagious not only for partners, but also for everyone around them. If Scorpio is in love and has just experienced a passionate night, all he needs to do is look at you for you to understand everything. (And everyone who happens to be nearby, too!) Scorpios are passionate, addicted, sensitive and sensual natures. It's no surprise that Bruce Willis fell in love with Scorpio seductress Demi Moore, a true sexual siren both on screen and in life. Meg Ryan has had many hobbies. And Scorpio men are not far behind. Look at Leonardo DiCaprio. Who would have thought that this boyish face would have such an impact on men and women of all ages? Scorpios know no boundaries. Scorpio men are often very attractive to other men, who are ready to treat them with the respect and admiration that this sign so requires.
Beware of hurting a Scorpio lover. Scorpios don't forgive so quickly. If there is a strange smell in your home, there may be a very simple explanation. But who put a dirty old sock behind the radiator? Mars, which rules Scorpios, is a changeable and unpredictable planet. Such are Scorpio lovers. If you even dare to think about betraying their love, you will be very lucky if they continue to greet you. Scorpios will easily forget your name if they catch you betraying you.
This sign does not tolerate mistakes. Suspecting betrayal, Scorpio will instantly disappear from your life.
But a Scorpio in love is ready to do anything to make his partner’s life happy in every sense of the word, including the sexual one. Gradually, Scorpio will open his soul to his partner, and you will learn something that the rest of the world will never know. Scorpio opens up only to those he trusts, and, believe me, it is worth earning this trust. Loyalty, magnetism and intuition are the distinctive qualities of Scorpio. But the other side of the coin is the ruthlessness and excessive suspicion characteristic of Scorpio, driven into a corner and suspecting betrayal.
A lonely Scorpio can achieve a lot. When Scorpios fall in love, the interests of their partner become more important to them than their own. They are ready to give up the ambitions of their entire lives in order to achieve complete self-realization in a relationship with a partner. And here they do not know half measures. If a Scorpio loves you, he will go wherever you take him. He will demonstrate his love physically, but also spiritually. It is very important for him to find a soul mate - otherwise Scorpio will never achieve complete satisfaction.
If you enter into a relationship with this powerful sign capable of deep love, you will not regret it. Look how a Scorpio in love behaves: he is gentle, affectionate, calm (if you can imagine a calm Scorpio). Look at the strange expression on his face. Don't worry: he's more likely to kiss you than knock you out - if your own intentions are honest, of course!
SCORPIO IN YOUR LIFE
In this section we will talk about the people with whom you work, relax and play sports.
Scorpios at work
Scorpios are a force to be reckoned with. From the very first minute of their acquaintance, subordinates and superiors understand that these people will not tolerate any confusion. Scorpios hire and fire far more people than any other zodiac sign. They are very picky. If a person does not satisfy them, they will not waste time retraining him to their liking, which would be done by a person born under a different sign. No, Scorpio will simply point to the door. Scorpio is a tough boss who wants to be admired even before he does anything to earn respect.
Scorpios expect everyone around them to act in accordance with their desires. They always reward loyalty. Scorpio does not notice mistakes unless they involve large expenses. Anyone who does something for Scorpio will not be forgotten and will receive their reward. But they do not forget the insults or inattention caused.
Scorpios are not afraid to take risks, including in business. Their careers are built as if at the gambling table. They have great ambition. As soon as they achieve something, they immediately begin to look around in search of the next field of application of their own strength. The more difficult the task, the more pleasure it gives Scorpio. Subordinates, colleagues and bosses will never be able to call Scorpio's work boring or uninteresting. They have an amazing ability to find a source of inspiration and even pleasure at their desk.
But I want to warn you. Scorpios always consider themselves bosses, regardless of whether they really are. They are convinced of their own infallibility and exclusivity. If they need to leave early to organize their own affairs, they will do it and will consider themselves absolutely right, even if the personal matter was just laundry. You shouldn't spread gossip about them. Their actions are already quite noticeable, and talking about them again is a waste of time. They simply do not consider it necessary to hide anything.
Scorpios are quite pleasant to talk to, but if they are in a bad mood, it’s a disaster! They spread despondency like the flu. When another person is in a bad mood, Scorpio can go out of his way to cheer him up. But it’s better not to be near a sad Scorpio; you still can’t do anything.
Scorpios are very efficient. If they like their work, they achieve great things in itsuccess. Behind anyone who has achieved success there are always many Scorpio subordinates. Scorpios want fame, but if they decide to stay in the shadows, you don’t have to drag them into the light of day. Scorpios only want recognition from those they love. It is the only thing that matters to them. Everything else is vanity.
Scorpios should not make friends at work. If you make friends with a Scorpio colleague, you will very soon start working and become emotionally dependent on each other, which is completely unacceptable.
Scorpios are excellent speakers. They are not afraid to enter into confrontation with the powers that be. They are able to convince you of their competence and make you buy anything. Scorpios are reliable and dedicated workers, but bosses need to make sure that they enjoy their work, otherwise they will not be retained. Relatives are proud of Scorpios' achievements. And those who doubt their strength will very soon find out for themselves how powerful, ambitious and energetic these people can be!
What to do if your mother-in-law or mother-in-law is Scorpio?
So where should I start? The Scorpio woman is quite good by nature, but she will want to know everything. When I say “everything,” I really mean everything, right down to the method of contraception you choose. She will calmly discuss your sex life with strangers. This sign has a strange feature: when talking about sex, she will talk about everything connected with it. Otherwise, she won't mention it at all. She is not a prude, and one should not expect her to act like a saint.
She values her position as a mother and strives with all her might to fulfill her role correctly. Doubts that she raised her children correctly sting her to the very heart. She is never satisfied with what she does for your spouse. And she perceives the successes and failures of her own child as something personal. Maybe her son didn't get a promotion last month because he didn't attend math class very often as a child, which she condoned.
Sometimes such a woman begins to rudely interfere in your life and constantly drips into your brains. But sometimes it disappears for several weeks, or even months. This means that she has completely exhausted her energy and simply cannot intervene, no matter how hard she tries.
If you don't tell her what's going on in your life, she'll find out anyway, and you'll look stupid. If you ask her to babysit the children or look after the house in your absence, be prepared for her to dig through the entire house, getting into the farthest corners. But such a woman will not read your diary. She has principles that she does not compromise, even if because of them she may lose the opportunity to learn something interesting. However, she does not need to read what is written. She has already conducted her own investigation. And then she will tell you what to do, and will do it so brilliantly that you will think that you yourself asked her for advice and should be grateful for it.
If you are organizing a party or wedding, make sure you are well stocked with finances. Your mother-in-law will force you to invite all her friends, insisting that these are your friends too, even if you have never even met half of these people. Don't think of her as stingy. She's not like that. She will give you her last penny if you need it. But she perceives any request for help as a sign that you are not able to live on your own.
Such a woman gets along well with children. She will definitely make friends with your friends. She does not establish contact with her son-in-law or daughter-in-law too quickly, since she always prefers relationships established by her own rather than someone else’s choice. She never forgets about good manners. She rules the kitchen with an iron fist and will definitely want to teach you how to cook the dish that her child especially likes.
If you hope that it will calm down with age, you will be deeply disappointed. At the age of forty, she learned that life was created in order to live, and actively puts her conviction into practice. It is easier to persuade her to go on vacation to Thailand than to spend it in the Canaries. She is drawn to adventure and entertainment. She's always fun to be with and your kids adore her. Sometimes she gets on your nerves, but without her it becomes boring. Don't be offended by this wonderful woman!
Scorpio Children
The Scorpio child is wise from the very moment of his birth. He knows very well what he wants. There’s no point in telling little Scorpios about sex; they already know everything from the time when you thought they were snoring peacefully in their beds.
Such a child can bring a lot of joy. Scorpio children have an unexpected sense of humor. It's interesting to be with them even when they are still very small. They learn to walk faster than other zodiac signs because they know very well that there are so many interesting places and wonderful people around. If they make a mistake, don't punish them seriously. They may never forgive you or even forget about the punishment if they consider it unfair. It is much better to sit down and calmly discuss the problem with them. If you tell them that they hurt you, you will punish them much more than just putting them in a corner.
Such children always have problems with one, or even all, teachers at school. They are somewhat arrogant and want to know the answers to all their questions. The French teacher sometimes has a hard time when little Scorpio demands from him the Latin equivalent of this or that word. If such children are late home, then it is quite possible that they were simply left after school. Although it is more likely that they simply found some entertainment on the way home and forgot about everything.
Even at a very early age, Scorpios are not shy about expressing their thoughts. This could lead to trouble. Although Scorpio children learn to speak early, they are not distinguished by their strong physique, and older children sometimes offend them for their thoughtless words. And how many crocodile tears little Scorpios shed. I know this very well. After all, I myself was such a Scorpio! I was very good at manipulating others with the help of tears. Unfortunately, it has become much more difficult to perform such tricks now. My husband (also a Scorpio) just tells me to calm down. Well, okay! At least once I could benefit from my talents.
Little Scorpios are not afraid of hard work, but they want to get paid for it. They are quite capable of completing a difficult task if it increases the amount of their pocket money. At school they are especially good at writing essays, and in drama clubs they achieve impressive success. They love to play and try to get the main role. If a boy who played the main role in a school play suddenly fell ill with food poisoning, then his role will definitely go to little Scorpio. I think everything is already clear to you.
Keep an eye on your Scorpio's friends as he becomes a teenager. His taste will be fully formed by the age of twenty, but in his youth he may take on obligations that he cannot get rid of. It can be quite expensive to return your little one from Australia, where he went so as not to be separated from his school love.
These children take life lightly. A wonderful sense of humor helps them in this. Everyone around him enjoys the company of such a child.
Scorpio friends
Scorpio friends want everything or nothing. If you betrayed their interests, they will try to make sure that all your mutual friends turn away from you. But if you are friends, then this friendship is incredibly strong. Scorpios love to be leaders and be the center of attention. If you are throwing a party, entrust the organization to them. Before you know it, they'll have invited a famous rock band. Just try to immediately dot all the i's in terms of financing. Scorpios' tastes don't always match your budget. They want everyone to have a good time. If you're in a bad mood, go somewhere with a Scorpio friend.
Scorpios prefer to separate friendship and work. They prefer to have fun when the work is done and they can forget about it. Scorpios often exaggerate the importance of their own work. If you come to their office and ask the boss, you will be surprised to find that your Scorpio friend works only as a secretary. This is not a lie, but just a misunderstanding!
Scorpios are very insightful. In this they are second only to Pisces. They immediately feel if something is bothering you and can help you sort out your problems that you are not fully aware of. If you knock on their door, you'll be immediately invited to share lunch and a bottle of wine. Scorpios do not know how to save money - they are simply not created for this. But they are quite capable of advising on how to earn them. But you shouldn't do business with them. At work you will see a completely different person. Scorpios never mix friendship and work.
They know how to manipulate their friends, but never harm them. They believe in karma, that everything in life will have to be paid for. Pluto, which rules this zodiac sign, is associated with life after death, so Scorpios take such issues very seriously. They have a wonderful sense of humor, although their jokes are not always clear to others. Even the dirtiest jokes do not irritate them. A hoarse, low voice is characteristic of almost all Scorpios.
Scorpio is a great friend. But I don’t wish you to have such an enemy. They never forgive anything. If you offended them, then you may not have the opportunity to make amends. They have a magnetic attraction for the opposite sex, which does not always suit their friends. But there is nothing to argue about here - such a sexy sign!
Scorpios know how to communicate with a variety of people. They are interested in new places. After drinking, they may say something that they later regret. I advise you not to pay attention to the words of a tipsy Scorpio.
And now the most important thing. If you haven't learned this yet, learn it now. Under no circumstances should you tell Scorpio that you have other close friends. They like to think that their friends belong entirely to them alone. They may have other friends, but if you can't make it to the meeting, they will feel betrayed. And don't argue with them. They are always right, even when they are wrong. Sometimes Scorpios may seem like your friends, but in reality they are not. They just love everything around them to go the way they want, and they know how to make sure everything is exactly that way.
If the scorpion stung not with poison, but with morphine, then it would be the favorite pet of millions of people.
05.02.2019
On this topic:
You are happy if:
- If you woke up healthy this morning, you are happier than 1 million people who will not live to see next week.
- If you have never experienced war, the loneliness of imprisonment, the agony of torture or hunger, you are happier than 500 million people in this world.
- If you can go to church without fear and threat of imprisonment or death, you are happier than 3 billion people in this world.
- If there is food in your refrigerator, you are dressed and shod, you have a roof over your head and a bed, you are richer than 75% of the people in this world.
- If you have a bank account, money in your wallet and some change in your piggy bank, you belong to the 8% of wealthy people in this world.
- If you are reading this, you are not one of the 2 billion people who cannot read.
02.02.2017
Care
An acquaintance decided to bring a little eroticism into her relationship with her beloved and perform a striptease for her beloved. On MTV, she really liked J.Lo’s video, where she douses herself with water at the end, sitting on a chair; it seemed to her the height of eroticism.
Preparation:
A chair was placed in the middle of the room, the room was simply covered with candles, the chair was placed in the farthest corner, and a large glass of warm water was placed next to the chair.
The young man was previously seated in a chair with the words
- I'll come now, I have a little surprise for you.
Execution:
After 10 minutes of waiting, she fluttered into the room in translucent underwear and began... the guy was beside himself with delight, he was completely immersed in the dance, and then the epic of history began...
She picks up the glass from the table with a sharp movement and drenches herself from head to toe, both of their eyes widen...
Instead of an epilogue:
The young man, having decided to show concern for his other half, also decided to do something nice for her while waiting for the surprise and, while she was changing clothes, went to the kitchen, poured out some warm water from a glass for no apparent reason and poured freshly brewed boiling tea into it.
12.02.2017
Fortune telling on a cockroach.
Catch a cockroach in the kitchen and take a close look at it.
If the cockroach is cheerful and healthy, then everything is in order in your home.
If the cockroach is bad, take care of your wife, she doesn’t feed you well.
If the cockroach is strictly black, a promotion awaits you.
If the cockroach is red, a blonde is in love with you.
If the cockroach is green, it means big money in foreign currency.
If a cockroach moves its whiskers all the time, you are an energetic, active person who cannot sit idle.
If the cockroach freezes, you are a philosopher.
If a cockroach looks surprised, those around you value you little.
If a cockroach is scared, you are a person who knows how to insist on your own.
If the cockroach is bright blue, horned and speaks in a human voice, congratulations, you have delirium tremens.
Now measure the cockroach.
If the length of a cockroach is less than 1 cm, you can be relied upon in family life.
If the length of a cockroach is more than 3 cm, you are a seeker.
If the span of a cockroach's whiskers is equal to the length of your nose, you are an inquisitive person.
If one cockroach's whiskers are noticeably shorter than the second, you have not yet realized your potential.
If the total length of a cockroach's whiskers is equal to the length of its body multiplied by the square root of the diameter of its belly and divided by
the logarithm of the number of his legs - you are a meticulous and meticulous person.
If the legs of a cockroach are evenly distributed throughout its body, you should see a psychiatrist just in case.
If the length of a cockroach is equal to its width, then it is a bug.
Now release the cockroach.
If he runs straight, you still have a long way to go.
If he runs to the left, an exciting meeting awaits you.
If he runs to the right, do some service: they are trying to hook you up.
If he runs back to you - oh, you're an interesting person.
If he doesn't run at all, he's dead.
08.02.2017
After sex...
Aries: Okay, here we go again!
Taurus: I'm hungry! Pass me the pizza!
Gemini: Where's the TV remote control?
Cancer: When will we get married?
Leo: Wasn't I great?
Virgo: Let me see the sheets
Libra: If you liked it, I liked it too
Scorpio: Perhaps now we can untie you
Sagittarius: Don't call me, I'll call you myself
Capricorn: Do you have a business card?
Aquarius: Now let's try WITHOUT clothes!
Pisces: So what do you say your name is?
10.09.2017
08.02.2017
The maniac sprayed the money with poison and donated it to an orphanage. Twenty deputies, two mayors and one minister were killed. The children were not harmed.
14.02.2017
I quarreled with my husband... I didn't talk to him the whole evening... They also went to bed in silence... But when I sneezed, a stream of saliva splashed right into his face. And then he neighed:
- Are you already spraying poison, my viper?
27.03.2017
I typed into Google “how to become kinder?” - the answers were different, but one simply killed me: “if you are a Scorpio, then no way”
15.03.2017
Can I pet you?
Here is a small sketch from the life of Kyiv students of the People's Institute
farms produced in 2001 (Hello to all Narkhoz members!).
My roommate and I are in a dorm, in a cheerful mood and a little drunk, going to the subway. There are a lot of people standing, holding the handrails. A pretty girl of about 20 years old is sitting directly opposite us with a kitten in her arms. My comrade, his name is Vasily, looks at the sleeping animal with emotion for about three minutes, just with silent adoration and undisguised delight.
The girl catches his gaze, expressing a wild range of feelings. They look into each other’s eyes for a minute, there is so much in this look... love for cats, for all domestic animals, for all cats and dogs, and at the same time for all living things.....
And here, without interrupting this traffic of feelings, Vasily breathes out:
-Can I pet you?
The girl, slightly embarrassed:
- Certainly….
Vasily gently strokes ..... no, not a kitten, but the girl’s breasts (it was summer, the blouse was thin, and there was something to stroke there), the girl blushes, Vasily gallantly says:
- Thank you…
The people around are lying flat, the girl takes off at the next stop...
03.02.2017
Long-distance trains give people the opportunity to fully feel like a house cat. You lie there all the time, sleep, and don’t do a damn thing. And you only get up to go to the toilet or eat. Well, you also look out the window at the birds.
03.02.2017
Dad, help me with my homework. What gender is the word "referee": masculine, feminine or neuter?
- It depends on how he judges...
18.01.2018
After marriage, even wild sex becomes domestic over time!
29.03.2018
Donald Rumsfeld and Colleen Powell are sitting in a bar, a guy comes up to them and
asks:
-Are you really Powell and Rumsfeld?
“Yes,” Powell replies.
“Wow,” says the guy, “what are you talking about, I wonder?”
“We,” says Powell, “are planning a third world war.”
- Yes? So what will you do?
“We will kill 10 million Afghans and one mechanic,” Powell replies.
“Oh, damn it,” the guy is surprised, “why do you need to kill a mechanic, maybe
No need?
Then Powell turns to Rumsfeld and says:
- See, Donald, I told you, no one gives a fuck about these 10 million
Afghans.
03.02.2017
A woman walks along the seashore, thinking about what a bastard her ex-husband is.
Suddenly the devil appears in front of her.
“I will fulfill any three of your wishes,” he says, “and completely free of charge.” But keep in mind: whatever you get, your ex-husband will get twice as much.
“First of all,” says the woman, “I want 10 million dollars.”
A check is immediately dropped into her hand.
- Secondly, I want a villa on the seashore.
There is a villa in front of her, and the keys in her hand.
“Your husband now has 20 million and two villas,” the devil reminds. -
So what's your last wish?
“You know,” the woman answers, “I always wanted to have big, lush and luxurious breasts...
At one time, each representative of this zodiac sign thinks about the question: “How to become kinder?” If you are a Scorpio, you will have to work hard. The struggle will be with character traits inherent in nature. And winning this war will not be easy!
Why you need to think about how to become kinder
Scorpio is not angry by nature. It’s just that his mind is cold, his gaze is penetrating, and there are no secrets for him. A person born under this zodiac sign is confident in himself, knows what he wants and always achieves it. Now imagine how an outside observer reacts to such positioning? It is quite natural that such a position seems too arrogant and sometimes cruel to him. One of the most unpleasant traits of Scorpio for others is his directness. It’s good when you tell the enemy to his face what he is like. What if you tell a woman that her new dress harmonizes perfectly with her green complexion? Who will tolerate this? So it turns out that from time to time you need to think about the fact that if you are a Scorpio, you may find yourself in a situation where the only person who can make you happy will run away from you with fear and tears! You don't need this, do you?
Does a good Scorpio exist?
Gentleness and a desire to help are not alien to this representative of the Zodiac. Few people can understand his true motives. So we began to deal with the question of how to become kinder. If you are a Scorpio and don’t want to lose your friends, then try to act in such a way that they understand you. This is perhaps the most important thing. The world of Scorpio, cozy and so logical for himself, is closed and strange to those around him. But it’s simple: let your friends into your experiences and ideas, and they will understand how kind you are to them! Any Scorpio is internally confident that he is fair and kind, his actions are aimed at the benefit of his loved ones. But he usually forgets to make sure that they believe in it too. Naturally, the moment is delicate! Why explain yourself if dear people already receive all the benefits? And, it turns out, it’s very necessary. Oddly enough, a person is closer to the warmth of the soul than material evidence of affection and friendship. And if you consider that the oddities of behavior in Scorpio are combined with touchiness and directness, then why be surprised that they are given a lot of advice on how to become kinder!
If you are a Scorpio, master introspection
People tend to perceive others from their own perspective. Scorpios often forget that those around them lack their strength and confidence. But not everyone manages to communicate with a powerful man on equal terms! So it turns out that Scorpio pushes away friends precisely because of what is most attractive about him! With your courage and
directness. The advice is this: analyze your actions and thoughts. Your strength is not only an advantage, but also a responsibility. Try to learn one rule: the strong must take care of the weak. If it becomes the basis of your behavior, then others will perceive you much easier. They will be more comfortable. This means the issue of kindness will be resolved! In the end, Scorpio saves his poison only for his enemies; he does not wish harm to others! This means that any representative of this sign is kind enough by nature, he just doesn’t know how to demonstrate it. A little self-control - and the desired effect will be achieved!
